My youngest son turned 11 last week and just like last year his birthday fell on a weekday and so I planned to bring cupcakes to school, something I've done for all three boys every year they were in elementary school. He wanted me to make chocolate cupcakes and I was happy to do it, and as I reflected at home how it was the last time for cupcakes at school from me....instead of being sentimental......I was SO ok with that.
It's funny because on that day that I decided I was perfectly happy moving along and saying good-bye to this ritual, there was a little incident that perhaps was "the icing on the cake".
I brought the cupcakes in a box and waited for my son's class to enter the lunchroom and begin to assemble at their long, rectangular lunch table. When all the students sat down, I started on the row opposite my son and began placing a cupcake in front of each child. I happened to be across from my son and was about to take out a cupcake for one child and he says, "I don't like chocolate." I said "OK, they are chocolate" and gave the child next to him a cupcake, and continued down the side of the table placing cupcakes in front of about 8 kids, then started working my way up the other side of the table. That is when a cafeteria worker stopped me.
She said to me gesturing at the the boy who didn't want a cupcake, "He says you did not give him a cupcake." I tell her, "He told me he does not like chocolate and I have chocolate cupcakes." She then tells the child, "Well, she only had chocolate cupcakes." I asked the boy, "Did you tell me that you do not eat chocolate?" and he replied yes. I then moved along to finish passing them out.
So that was a first--while I was passing out cupcakes this child actually drew enough attention about his lack of a cupcake to the supervisor for her to come over. I am not taking this personally--actually it gave me a glimpse of what many parents may not be aware of--the constant need for manners and discipline in the classroom. Last year the teachers were asked to give up their 25 minutes of lunch time to eat lunch with their students to mind them. This year I am happy that the teachers have their bathroom and lunch break (a couple of personnel were hired to monitor the lunch room and parents have been asked to volunteer--it is a great way to see the constant disciplining that has to take place and I am not even talking about cupcake manners). Many students said "thank you". Later I reiterated to my son that he must always say thank you when someone gives him something--a team snack, etc.
But here is what else I have to say about it. If teachers are to be graded based on their students' test scores for merit pay, the teachers need to grade the parents on certain parenting criteria.
7 comments:
This is a minute detail of what I see and hear going on in classrooms and at school so I may sound a bit grouchy. I do need to update on the high school teacher incident--it had me so worn out and engaged I practically needed a vacation to recover.
I agree that I am sometimes astonished by the lack of manners and just the entitlement of some children. And honestly usually the apple doesn't fall from the tree.
Can't wait to hear your teacher update.
OMG don't even get me started! I would have not been so gracious with that cafeteria worker. I would have said, "nunya", as in "none of your business"! :) MY son's cupcakes, not yours. This stuff just gets me so riled up. And yes, the insanity of the idea that the child who first, instead of just saying, "no thank you", or "no thank you I don't like chocolate", just blurts out, "I don't like chocolate" as if you should have asked him ahead of time which flavor he would like brought to him special, then, when he does not get the chocolate cupcake that he "does not like" and therefore, does not want, makes a huge fuss about it. WTF? Hmmm. I just don't like cafeterias, I guess! And, the idea of giving up our small lunch period, which we have to do sometimes for faculty meetings, which they are not allowed to make us attend during our lunch period, is terrible. I can't believe the teachers gave up their lunch periods! This may sound petty, and teachers are currently under fire for complaining, but, you know what they say, "Until you've walked a mile in my shoes..."
Michele being in school environments tends to make me feel worn out in general, so I understand.
I am surprised that you were even allowed to bring homemade treats to school. We can only send in pre-packaged treats...bleck.
And yes, if parents only knew....
Oh honey, all my volunteering this year has opened my eyes to the rudeness that lurks everywhere. From the kiddos who leave trash on the floor knowing that "someone" will pick it up for them to the parents who are oblivious to holding a door open or say thank you when I do.
I'm scared. Like really, really, really scared.
Whaaaaaa! I want a cupcake! I deserve a cupcake!
(head banging on cinderblock wall)
Nothing gets me riled up like matters with school!
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