Gifts Before Christmas

Sigh, it's the last day of December.  I'm very sentimental but I am ready for a new year.  So ready that I gathered all the Christmas knick knacks and placed them on the living room floor to be packed away tomorrow or the next day.

I bought almost everything for the boys from Amazon.  At the beginning of December I told the older two to pick out what they wanted from Amazon and to put it in the cart for my perusal later.  They know the price range.  One of my middle son's gifts was an acoustic guitar.

I'm totally amazed that the large box arrived with a huge sticker on the front showing exactly what the gift was.  Our UPS guy arrives at 5:00 p.m. and everyone is home and saw the gift.  Good thing it was not a surprise gift.  I do lament how gift giving was a little more exciting when they were younger but they assure me they do not mind there are no surprises as long as they get some things they covet.

So the huge guitar box went un-wrapped under the tree and it was the first item.

I should complain on Amazon as a reviewer and warn future recipients.

My husband received a $100 gift card to Home Depot from his students, which is so nice.  The day before Christmas here is what he bought:

On Christmas Eve he installed a new garbage disposal as ours bit the dust a few days into winter break.

Tonight on New Year's Eve we are home watching dvds after turning down a neighbor's party.  We are exhausted --although there is always the chance that Hubs gets a second wind late at night doing house stuff.  Yes, you heard me -- usually he finds something to fix or something to clean at 11:00 p.m. or so (I have started a photo journal of this habit).  Last night's chore, however, is a very ugly, horrendous project that is taking place in the basement.

The oldest two sons have been invited to spend the night at different friends' houses and we are here with our 5th grade son.  Talk about gifts before Christmas.  I was just reminding Hubs how eleven years ago when we lived in a different house (that was not a Money Pit) we had a few friends over ringing in the year 2000.

We had been trying for baby number 3 and I would later find out in January that our Christmas gift was arriving in September, 2000 (a year 2000 in the Year of the Dragon is a Golden Dragon.  He loves that).

He is a wonderful gift and my buddy.  With flexible eyebrows:

And as much as my Hubs annoys me with his constant need to clean and do chores just when I am relaxing, I do treasure that he still drives the boys to three different restaurants -- even this year -- to get me restaurant gift cards  for our one-on-one dates.  He started this tradition when they were very little.  And they make cards to this day out of my former-life-scrapbook materials.  They put them actually on the tree.  And I peek ahead of time. 

What they write makes tears drop from my eyes, makes me smile and gives me strength.


It's almost time to ring in the New Year and I am seriously hearing Moonshiners on the TV--better go change the channel.  Happy New Year!

Santa and the Boys Meet Again

The Sunday before Christmas has become for years our tradition of taking the boys to the mall to visit Santa.  And yes, our boys are in 10th grade, 8th grade and 5th grade.  And yes, the two oldest are not thrilled but they no there is no negotiation.  They may utter some words of dissent in November but don't say much as the day gets closer and I remind them how on that particular Sunday we leave the house at 8:45 a.m.

 Plus, the boys know that after Santa we walk the mall and buy them new clothes as Christmas gifts (that have to get wrapped and then opened on Christmas day).


We were first in line at about 9:20 a.m. which is what we accomplish every year.  I sat on the floor and the boys and Hubs walk around a little bit and meet back just before 10:00 a.m.  When we arrived a worker for the company that takes and sells you the photos arrived and I asked her if Santa was coming at 10:00 and wihout even looking up from her table she answered yes with a grunt.  Why don't I ever say out loud what I thin such as, "Does someone need a hug?" (from Elf).

Santa arrived via a nearby escalator and we were happy to see it is the same Santa for the past five or six years we've gone to this mall.  He greets everyone in line and I know he does a mental double take when he sees the two oldest standing there who are about 5'7" and 5'8" this year.  I told Santa it's been a 5 year tradition seeing him.

Hubs told Santa that our family rule is to make a visit to him for as long as they live at home.  Santa thought it was a great rule.  He is the most personable Santa ever, and we love him because he takes a lot of time and asked again this year if they clean their rooms.  They struck out on that and then he asked if they fight with each other.  They struck out on that too.

At the end of their visit he had them put their hands in for a "Goooo Santa cheer".  It all makes me very happy inside.

And then we found some great sales on clothes for the boys and a baseball mitt for Oldest (very little surprises under the tree when they get older but it does not bother them).

And then for our traditional lunch out on the Day We Visit Santa, I heard about a place where you pick out your own "protein" and spices and veggies and sauces like a Mongolian BBQ or stir fry and they cook it and bring it to you in a big bowl and then you can go back for all you can eat.  It was really yummy and not crowded until we left--a great choice and a wonderful day.

And then after we read the Sunday paper back at home (yes, we are old fashioned and get the paper once a week)  and relaxed for about an hour, it was more cleaning and painting and fixing back at home for us adults.

My Last School Winter Party Attendance Was Today

Phewwww.  I am already tearing up whenever I think of my youngest son finishing 5th grade this May where I will see him on the stage of the high school, receiving accolades for his hard work in grades, attendance and safety patrol.  Also, this month I am really tickled at still being able to pick out "toys" that are surprises for him from Amazon (unlike the other two whom I tell to pick out what they want on Amazon and put it in the cart).

But today was the last winter party and I am not verklempt.

I do not know why I am the one parent who is the one to put together stuff for a craft.  They really didn't even need it--I think they were just thrilled to have lots of treats to eat and the last hour and 20 minutes of the day spent having a party.  Sidenote: my husband traditionally asks the room mom to do a craft (such as a fleece scarf) that his 5th grade students will make and give to their Kindegarten buddies who will remember the gift long after one the students would make for themselves.

So I find out last week or so that there is no craft and last year I had the 4th grade class do rice sock snowmen which ended up costing me about $75 for supplies and I certainly didn't want to do that.  The next thing I knew I was telling the room mom that maybe I could figure out a candle craft.  (Note: the craft cannot be an ornament or anything pertaining a particular culture or religion--it is so interesting how my older boys have made ornaments in early grades and none for my 5th grader.  Not that there is anything wrong with that).

This is how you come up with a candle craft and make yourself not even worry about it in advance: Go to the Dollar Store the day before the party with no plan, to the candle aisle and see what is available for 22 of the same candle (got a green one bigger than a votive).  Wander around the aisles and buy decorative small paper plates, a styrofoam snowflake, some glitter glue and some shiny red or gold wire ribbon stuff and voila.  A little centerpiece with the candle on top of the snowflake which sits on the place, a little glitter glue on the plate, and the shiny wired wreath piece wrapped around the candle.

On the way driving back home I got a call from my grandmother who was advised by her doc to go to the hospital because the big sore on her leg from a cut is not getting better.  Today is day two and she gets very little info and may get an MRI.  I know this is why I am also distracted today.

So, so thankful that I have a job that lets me work from home so that I can take the hour to go to the Dollar Store yesterday and then today take the hour to be with my son at his winter party.  And an hour to make cookies for it.

Having lunch with him last week was much more enjoyable than today so I will make sure to do this several more times because moms at middle school lunch does not happen.  Girl fights do.  There have been slug-fest, hair-pulling fights during lunch at middle school (and high school too) and both my older boys tell me they involve only girls several times a year.

So for this year that I have one in high, one in middle and one in elem school, we are still going to see Santa this Sunday--it's tradition.  We'll be first in line as usual to get it done (I bet Santa is surprised when they turn the corner and see him, especially this year that two are taller than me).  We then walk around the mall and the oldest two find clothes they want so it is a trade off I suppose.  They are just glad that none of their friends are there on a Sunday at 9:30 - 10:00 a.m.  I'll miss that tradition one year soon but not the winter class party.

Hope everyone has a good class party, or party soon.

December's Long Night Moon

It is also known as the Cold Moon or the Moon Before Yule and it looks full tonight although it is technically full on December 10th.  AND there will be a total Lunar Eclipse with this full moon.  Except we can't see it on the east side of the US.  Maybe I will get to see the next one which won't happen until April 2014.  Not that I would be up at dawn tomorrow anyway!

It has gotten cold here and I actually welcome that (boo hiss to hot flashes).  We usually go "find our tree" at Home Dept the Sunday after Thanksgiving but we waited a few days after that.  Last weekend I flew to Fort Myers, FL to visit my 90 year old grandmother.  I usually go for a Sat-Mon weekend in December to bring her some company, although I dread leaving home.

I refer to our Christmas Tree's angel as the Angel of Air Traffic Controller -- doesn't she look like it?

She does not "go with" our tree but now that I have started visiting Grandma these past few years in December just after we set up the tree, that is what the angel means to me.

I stayed with my grandmother for five days this past July and now five months later it's really apparent how she is moving slower and slower with her walker and her highlight is usually going to the Red Lobster where she ignores and strolls past the hostess, calling back over her shoulder, "I know where I want to sit."

But she wasn't up to it this time and it was a good thing I visited when I did because she had a cut on her leg bound tightly which was ignoring doc's directions of letting it "air out".  I was there for her doctor's appt and so fortunately she is listening to him now.  It was all very depressing and I come from a line of dysfunction of which I have broken the chain.  And instead of Red Lobster or Longhorn I cooked and froze about eight homemade meals.

I can't lie--I was so glad to get back to my guys.  You know, living here is like being at a frat house.  There's never pretty music playing.  In fact the joke is that when I decorate the tree I never listen to holiday music--instead I have to listen to crazy TV shows like "The Top 20 Most Shocking" Cop Car Chases Gone Bad or Girl Fights or something..  This year a new show was on the Discovery Channel called Moonshiners.

Hubs was putting back together his closet and made a box of items to take to Goodwill.  I said, "You know, the boys are big now so maybe they should take a look at some of these belts and jeans and shirts you don't want.  And I showed Middle Son some overalls that were in the box (I think Hubs wore them to do yard work many, many years ago.  I used to like it when he wore these one-piece coveralls when working under a car but that is a different story) and he got pretty excited about them saying the guy he was just watching on Moonshiners was wearing overalls with no shirt.  So he quickly puts on the overalls with no shirt and we all got a kick out of it.  He even asked me if I was going to get the camera.

Right now they are all watching some comedian even though I told Hubs we needed to watch Crazy Stupid Love together alone.  Keep warm during the Full Cold Moon, wear a shirt, go outside and tell me if you can see the moon and or the Lunar Eclipse.

Some Before, During or After Photos

I had my whirlwind trip to Idaho and back and it has taken me a week to get over feeling so spaced and worn out.  I now have a cold and go through 50 tissues a day--I must have caught it from the four planes I had to take to get there and back.  I won't ever rush the trip again like I did but I am glad I did this time to get home before the airports turned Thanksgiving crazy.  Plus I managed to go and not get stuck in a snow drift (although at the Utah/Idaho state line the temp dropped and snow flurries began and I almost freaked out except the roads are nicely salted).  This past week my head has been full of memories of gorgeous scenery.

North of Salt Lake City I saw an In 'n Out Burger place and I had never been but heard so much about it so I pulled over.  I did like how the menu was very simple.  I have to say though that I was not in love with the burger.  However, I was blown away by the super friendly service of the young people working there.  I would return for service like that.

OK, onto some before and after photos..........of my hair.  I realized that my hair lady has been going a little crazy and rushing when doing my highlights.  Instead of highlighting thin pieces, she highlights chunks of hair.  She also loves to use low lights which is good, but also very dark lights, darker than my own hair.  I had become a lady with frosted hair.  Not good.  Check it out:

Take a look at the hair above my right eyebrow  That first color is not a shadow.  It is very dark hair next to a light chunk.  And at my left temple was a big highlighted piece which I hated.  In fact, right after I paid for this in mid-October, I texted my hair lady to tell her I needed to come back in to darken my temple areas.  Then I was going to counsel her on how we can no longer have such light and dark contrasts any longer.  But I couldn't get in to see her during the times she suggested and my so-called frosted life went on.  Then it became 5 weeks later so I made another appt and I told her about the issues.  What I wanted was not such blonde, thick highlights.  What did she do?  Gave me dark brown hair with an auburn look in the sun.  I think it is darker than my actual hair.  And she still managed to put in highlights, which she even had to tone down while my head was in the sink.

There is light shining on my hair here--I think it is actually darker.  Of course she still managed to get in some chunky highlights on top.  I picked up my youngest from school and he said all in one sentence, "Well, I liked it better lighter, but you look sophisticated and it goes well with your (brown) jacket)."
I am going to see if I can wait till spring before spending any money on my hair again.

Our master bath remodel began on October 31 and it is still going on.  The demolition took place by Hubs and the boys all during October so for two months we have been sleeping on our guest bed which is a queen and not a king.  Gah!  I still hang on to nine inches on the side because my other half gets in the middle.  I think the remodel would have been done by now except a couple weeks ago our worker only worked Mon and Tues as he got sick and then last week he only worked Mon and Tues.  But since he is paid by the day we are not mad.  But ready for him to get done and get the hell out. Lucky for us, this past week Hubs has been able to do some things we would have paid him to do.

Remember this photo of Oldest sweeping where an old garden tub was?  Well, that is my new closet now where he is standing.  Hubs taped up that big mirror which was above a garden tub which I never used.  The mirror is in our garage and will go above new tub). On the right, near his left foot is a vanity.  So popular in the '80's.  It got ripped out.

The new bathtub is along the wall where that vanity was.  Oh, and lots of insulation went into the wall--the other side of the wall is hallway to the kids' rooms.  I don't want to hear their loud noises when I do my future soaking.

Ignore that toilet in my closet.  That is just sitting there out of the way.  The bathtub is completely tiled now (more photos to come).

And now above is a shot of my closet--the floor is interlocking bamboo.  Hubs has since put in white floorboard molding.  Hubs painted the closets plain white.  That back white wall is where the mirror above the old tub was.  And there will be a pocket door to save room on that new wall between the closet and tub.  My closet is not big but I am still going to have a party in there.  There's a skylight toward the right inside.

One of the biggest changes is we have a large bedroom and then this funky shaped large bathroom but we had a little doorway going from the bedroom to the bathroom.  To the right of this doorway is the closet we shared and just inside this closet was a linen-shelved area which used seems like 10 trees worth of wood for the shelves.  It had to go since we widened the doorway to allow for French doors.

If you look at the ceiling you can see where the old hallway was vs. how it is widened.  It makes a huge difference.  And I don't know how we have remained sane for five years but we lived with that striped wallpaper in our cavernous bathroom.  The walls are now a taupe color:

The sink will go under that taped-up mirror and everything should be wrapped up soon.

In the meantime I have not yet bought one Christmas present, I didn't shop Black Friday for the first time in years, am very grateful we did not have to travel to Florida for Thanksgiving this year, and another change is that we usually buy our Christmas tree at Home Depot the weekend that just passed but we did not.  It was 71 degrees on Sunday!  Now it is 39 degrees so maybe tonight we'll get it.

Driving in Idaho

Have I mentioned there is occasional travel for my new job?  I have to visit Idaho in a week!  I think it will be an awesome place to visit in the summer, and that will probably happen, but since I have to go in November, you can best believe I have been consulting weather.com on a daily basis.  It indicates that there are snow showers going on.  I don't do snow in a vehicle.  Maybe I'll have to.

Do you see that town called Pocatello in the southeastern part of Idaho?  Once I land in Salt Lake City, Utah (where I have never been either) on my second flight of the day, I have to rent a car and get on I-15 and drive 2.5 hours north to Pocatello.  The client says it is an easy drive on I-15.  I bet the client has lived in Idaho his whole life.  Whereas here in Atlanta the entire state I think owns three snow plows so if it ices or snows families stay home and watch the news clips of cars slipping and sliding.

So, anyone ever been to Salt Lake City and had to drive on I-15 north to Idaho?  Please tell me.

The day I arrive there will have been snow showers for two days with a morning low of 12 degrees.  But it should get up to 36 degrees and be sunny when I'm there so at least it is above freezing, right?

On the bright side, I am coat and boot shopping this week.

Go Look at the Full Beaver Moon

A couple of nights ago I saw the moon almost full with a bright star just to the left of it.  Turns out that was Jupiter.  I was just now driving to the grocery store and the moon was so bright in the dusk sky I almost drove off the road looking at it.  Tonight that bright star to to the right of the moon is Jupiter.

Why was I heading to the store at 5:45 p.m.?  Because my oldest son just pointed out we were almost out of milk and there were no juices or anything else to drink (I just drink water about 80% of the time).  We go through 4 to 5 gallons of milk a week and oldest son alone would drink one bottle of cranberry juice a day if I let him.

Me: "Wha???  I have already been to the store twice this week!"

Him: "We are growing teen-age boys, Mom."

Well.

I've written about the Full Beaver Moon before.  This is when the Native Americans saw the beavers getting ready for winter. And then the fur traders expanded the West big time in pursuit of the beaver.  Did you know they are the largest rodent in North America?  We have a small one living in our house (a Russian Dwarf hamster).

Tomorrow is 11/11/11.  I know of someone getting married tomorrow for the date 11/11/11.  I would do that in a heartbeat.  One of my oldest friends and I will be chatting tomorrow on 11/11/11.  Ever since high school when we were together on 7/7/77 and talked about it then, we've made it a point to always remind each other of how we talked about the future and would we talk on 8/8/88 or 9/9/99 or 10/10/10.  There have also been conversations or messages left on 01/01/01, 02/02/02, etc. Can't really do it after 12/12/12.  Well, there is always 01/03/13.

Hope all is well in your neck of the woods under this November Full Beaver Moon.

That down time is now a Vague Memory

The days are flying by!  But I am so glad that I have the flexibility to be here a lot when the kids get home or to pick them up from school.

Here is what Middle School son looks like when he sees me taking his photo after picking him up from cross country practice after school.  I couldn't help it.  He looked so vibrant and healthy (and I am so grateful for these blessings):

And Saturday morning was chilly but so crystal clear and gorgeous outside watching him run cross country:

(never mind that I get a photo in front of the porta potties).

After about five weekends our master bath is completely demolished.  I'll post more later on how it is a miracle we weren't electrocuted in the shower these past five years we've lived in our 30 year old house.

And the wallpaper in the bathroom included two layers on top of drywall so the only logical thing to do is take down the dry wall.

We have an excellent tradesman and his bad-ass daughter who were the latest crew to be given the tour of our crazy-designed master bath and who got the job of re-creating it this week.  More on that later.  Hubs and I are guests now in our own home being in our guest room and all.

So many areas of parenting are harder with kids getting older.....but not Halloween.  It was easier this year -- I found that out even though I've been lamenting the younger years and gazing at photos.  Being easier this year really worked out well because I haven't had a lot of down time.  The days of getting three pumpkins and carving them all fancy are over.  I did one:

And a couple weeks ago our youngest son (5th grade) told us he wanted to be an IRS agent and carry a briefcase.  He needed a suit jacket anyway.  He watches lots of TV (and is smarter than everyone in the house put together) and said he saw an ad for attorneys "Montlick and Asso" and then an ad for "Are debt collectors after you?" and he got the idea.  He asked Hubs for a week to show him how to tie a tie and Hubs showed him about an hour before trick or treating and now he is the best tie-er in the house and tied his own tie.

When I asked Middle School son what he was doing he said grunt, grunt.  Then suddenly on Halloween he told us that he and some friends were going to go around our 'hood and he got out the bag of past blood, scars and amputated hands and found facepaint and made himself a zombie with dirt and leaves in his hair and blood on his shirt and he left for a couple hours.  Oldest son left for a couple hours too to a friend's house.  I think it was a coed low-key party of sorts.  But he was back home at 9:00.   I walked around with some moms in another 'hood as our n'hood is too hilly for maximum number of houses to cover.  Fortunately Youngest was ready to go home the same time I was.

In one month there'll be a Christmas tree in our house.  Amazing!

Mama's Getting a New Closet

We have lived in our house for over 5 years and when we first viewed the house and stepped into the master bath it was almost a deal breaker.  That and the kitchen and the deck.  We had the deck turned into a screened porch but have lived with the crappy bathroom and kitchen ever since.

As previously mentioned, Hubs made a list of things to redo in the house when I got a job.  Well as soon as I got my job offer six weeks ago, the master closet and bathroom DIY project began.

Over the past few years I cannot tell you how many men have walked through our master bedroom and into our bath to give their opinion on how to renovate this monstrosity.  For example, a neighbor has had about 10 different contractors at his house (he's retired) over the years, and my Hubs moseys on over there and asks the contractors to take a look at our master bath.  I get about 3 minutes' notice and run in the bathroom and hide my retainers that I wear at night and keep next to my sink.  And then they always come up with a plan that is too expensive and then Hubs always tells me, "Well I can do most of the work myself except for the plumbing and the electrician."

But we did gain an idea from one of the contractors to make a new closet at the end of the bathroom where there is an old, 1980's garden tub.  People, I have not had a bath in five years.  Our master bath is very large with the craziest ceiling angles and wackiest layout ever.  Can you believe there was a lamp hanging over the bath?  There is also a skylight--anyway, the whole end of the bathroom will be a new closet for me.

(next to where I am standing is a hideous "vanity" although it was handy for my hair and jewelry and make-up stuff).

That huge mirror came down in one piece.  Hubs saw on You Tube that you cover it with packing tape and then remove it.

Of course, the boys were involved with the demolition, which they bought into at first.  But quickly they realized that it involved carrying a crap load of debris out of the house, over and over.  I once returned from a Saturday of food shopping with two of them running up to my car like a flock of turkeys, pleading, "Mom, this is the pits and out of nowhere Dad has us working and working and carry garbage that is way to heavy and we need to get started on homework!"

Fortunately we have an old truck so over a few weekends Hubs took it to a dump and pays about $30 to leave the debris there rather than paying for a dumpster at the house.

Here is Oldest sweeping all around where the bathtub used to be.  Take a look by his left foot.  That is the plumbing down in the floor for the old bathtub faucets.......

Hubs is a little obsessive with the weekend work.  One Saturday night at 9:00 I heard him in the bathroom breaking up tile (the former owner had put tile on top of former tile).  I came up to see what he was doing, annoyed that he couldn't just be watching TV like a normal person.  He chatted while he continued to jab at tile and was standing right in front of that faucet plumbing area and then he stepped back.....and his leg went right through the faucet area.


And now I know that my new closet will be right above where my car is parked in the garage.

Anyway he cursed and ranted at himself for not covering that area as he new it was a potential problem and I went into the garage to see debris all over the hood of my car.  Luckily no chunks fell on it.  His leg and hand got scraped up.  He then ranted and raved about how he hatred his drill as I stood by the step ladder so he could stand on the ladder and screw nails into a piece of plywood over the new big hole in the garage.

(see the ceiling above my car)

On a positive note he stated he was glad that at least he stepped through the ceiling over the garage and not a nice ceiling such as a hallway, which has happened a few years ago, where you actually have to make it look nice again.

The shower is getting ripped out this weekend.  To be continued...

The More Things Change...

It's another beautiful fall season here with the flowers loving the warm afternoons and cool mornings.

I have been at my new job for four weeks and it is going great.  Some mornings I practically pinch myself to make sure the job I wanted really did come along at the right time.  The items needed for working at home have not arrived yet and so I go into the office almost regularly (my choice to get to know people and fortunately it is just a 15 minute drive).  Starting a new job means no one has seen your clothes before.  I have more wrinkles than just about everyone there.....but my fingernails look fabulous.  I received a Blackberry about 10 days ago and I have not taken time to learn it yet.  I got an Iphone six months ago and I was actually trying to touch the Blackberry's screen to make it work (!)  So many programs and systems to learn for work.

On the homefront I am still my boys' personal shopper and bring home clothes from TJ Maxx for their choosing.  I learned from last year that high schoolers need Homecoming clothes in October and I made sure the pants and shirt were purchased well in advance.  The shoes slipped my mind until the day before so Hubs took him to DSW and he found a pair.  Last year's Homecoming shoes were found there as well, and worn only once.  I lamented this but quickly got over it after I realized that boys don't require many shoes or accessories.

Sidenote--on the morning of homecoming our area was having many n'hood yard sales and in one driveway a college-aged girl was selling a bunch of designer purses of hers.  I realized how easy it is to not have to buy all of those items, hair care, make-up, etc. (a fact that my high school son reminds me when he calls to ask if I can pick up deoderant or face wash for him).

Back to the items needed for Homecoming: my high school son exclaimed that he and some buddies were going to wear bowties instead of regular ties so I told him to find what he wanted online.  Well, it was not a clip-on and we ran out of time for a tying-the-bowtie practice and on Homecoming day he had a baseball game until 4:00 and he needed to be Homecoming dressed by 5:00 (easily accomplished for a boy).  But then the pressure was on to do the bowtie.

That was Hubs' job but he had to recruit Youngest son to sit in front of the computer and click Pause and Play on the You Tube bowtie-instruction video:

It got pretty intense and I stayed out of the way except for a few photos.  Then our son got picked up by a parent up the street and photos took place somewhere else and for the second year in a row I was not involved because our son told us he had his rides all figured out (no dates, yay).  That is until 12:30 a.m. when he called to say he and a neighbor needed a ride home.  Luckily Hubs is a night owl and was still up.

That same beautiful weekend morning we had Thanksgiving dinner visit us in our front yard:

The night before this, Hubs was telling his mom, who was visiting, that not only are deer crossing the road and in our yard, but that there are turkeys in the 'hood.  I had not seen any in our hood, and then I got up Saturday a.m. and they they were in the front yard.

After we watched them for a little bit and they wandered off somewhere I had to run an errand and when I backed out they came running over--not shy at all.  I had to get out of my car to see where they went as I was not finished backing up.  They were making gobbling noises when I took the photo about 2 feet from them.

(what is that weird feather thing sticking out from their chests?)

So, everything is going well.  Lots of projects going on here that I will feature soon, two boys out of three are taller than me (I am 5'6") and one still fits under my chin (I sing that to the "Under My Thumb" tune to him), and one out of three will be trick or treating a week from today.  This week's errand is to find a dark suit and hat because he wants to be an IRS man for Halloween.

Update on that Teacher Situation

After Hubs and I decided we needed to meet with this teacher and an assistant principal, I contacted one of the assistant principals (AP) to set up a meeting with an AP and this teacher, who teaches an Advanced Placement class, to talk about some classroom concerns and grading on projects so far.  One thing on which I hadn’t previously blogged is there were some summer projects and seems teacher didn’t even read the work and graded based on volume (this is when son asked about it and teacher answered with a “yup” and didn’t even look at son).

It took a few days to get the meeting date and then there was another teacher invited who is the leader of the school’s advanced placement program.  Prior to the meeting the teacher decided to send us this email and I didn’t respond:

Mr. and Mrs. Last name,
It has been communicated to me that you would very much like to have a
meeting with myself to have a discussion about your son, (name) in my
class.  I look forward to satisfying this demand.  Please let me know the
best time that is convenient for you to meet with myself.  I have time
available in the mornings or in the afternoon.

I got all riled up at this email.  He is going to satisfy this demand.

The meeting went well for us parents.  It did not go well for the teacher.  I liked the AP who was present.  He took pages and pages of notes. 

The meeting was in the teacher’s classroom, with five desks arranged in a circle.  Hubs sat to my left and the AP to his left.  The leader teacher was to my right.  Directly across from Hubs was this teacher.  When we sat down the teacher started by saying, “What can I do for you guys today?”  As you know, he is arrogant.

At first we addressed one of the summer projects.  I was prepared with a copy of the assignment posted in the summer and my son's assignment--it states to read a certain book choice out of 7 books, and list 30 quotes and then comment on each quote in page number order to show you have read all parts of the book.  A friend of my sons did not read the book, and responded with 2 sentences on each and listed 40 quotes.  he got a 100.  This killed my son because he read the book and listed 30 quotes and gave 6 thoughtful sentences on each.  When assignments were handed back just prior to this meeting, Son had asked teacher if he had listed and commented on 40 quotes would he have gotten an A and that is when teacher said “yup” to him.  So at meeting we had to discuss how son was looking for guidance but we also had to discuss does advanced placement mean a student gets graded on poundage?  Hubs stated how a teacher can know in 10 problems if a student read the material and gets it or not.  Teacher had hopped up looking around for the assignment rubric (I had a copy) and he defended that he told the kids on 1^st day of school he’d give them a few more days to add more to assignment.  The AP spent a very long time looking at son’s assignment and concluded he saw son add a few more quotes and he could tell he read book and had good sentences.  Teacher defended self on how with 3 classes and how there are almost 30 kids in classes this year that would be reading thousands of answers.  Ummmmm, yes?  It was clear that teacher stated he’d take another look at his work.  This is foreshadowing.

After this teacher says, “So we are meeting about his grades?”  We told him there was a lot more to discuss.

Next we moved on to the distractions.  Don’t think the leader teacher knew all this was coming.  Hubs brings up that teacher is kicking a soccer ball against wall during quizzes.  Teacher does not deny.  He states that he will stop if it is distracting our son.  Michele’s blood begins to boil.  AP does not interject to say that it is inappropriate for any child in any of his 3 classes, but AP is writing notes big time.

Then we bring up using the cell phone during quizzes and how there are noises that make the class giggle such as a baby crying and laughs and an animal noise.  Teacher denies using cell phone in class and states that perhaps the noise is coming from classroom next door.  Michele knows he is lying and keeps calm face while blood temp reaches 200 degrees.

Then we bring up the group presentation at which one student keeps his backpack on and the teacher mocks him and gets class laughing (and group received a failing grade even though they thought their presentation was better than two others that rec’d “C”s.  Teacher knew exactly what this was and said he gave the student a chance to take off backpack.  Hubs wanted to know that although this was unusual, maybe it was his “schtick” since there are presenters in the world who walk back and forth as they present, etc.  Teacher does not deny that this all happened and teacher said he directed the class’ attention back to the presenters (ummm, yes, due to you, teacher, is why the kids were giggling).   In addition, there was a two-page paper due along with this presentation and even though the boys had a good thesis, the teacher circled the bottom two inches of the 2^nd page to show that the 2^nd page was not complete and gave them an "F".  Again, a conversation about grading on poundage and Hubs mentions how a writer can knock a one page paper out of the park vs. two pages in many cases.    We state that son will ask to meet with teacher to LEARN how he can improve on future papers.

Then we get to the laser pointer infraction.  Hubs starts by saying that as a fellow teacher in this county, he hopes that of the following he hopes he heard wrong.  I then described that apparently during power point presentations the students take a few minutes to take notes in between each slide and during this time the teacher is pointing the laser pointer at kids’ heads and people giggle (I did not mention that according to my son he mostly chooses girls’ heads).  Teacher did not deny this.  By this time teacher is glancing at AP.  Hubs continues on for about 7 minutes on how this is against policy is the school system handbook (leader teacher is nodding), and how his students have been suspended for acts less than this, and how horrible it would be if it hit an eye and, as teacher to teacher, we do not need anything like this to get around and have a teacher story in the news.  This was serious stuff. 

Meeting was concluded with the AP stating that they will address the distraction concerns and we would have our son approach the teacher to set up a time to review work and be able to ask questions.  Everyone shook hands and then the lead teacher took us to the elevator (it needs a key) and she thanked us for the meeting as “she knew it was difficult but they really appreciated it and that they do now want students to leave the advanced placement program.”

As we drove home we had the feeling that teacher was not going to be having a good night.

I’ll write another post on the situation and an email from teacher in the two weeks since this.

The Cupcake Incident

My youngest son turned 11 last week and just like last year his birthday fell on a weekday and so I planned to bring cupcakes to school, something I've done for all three boys every year they were in elementary school.    He wanted me to make chocolate cupcakes and I was happy to do it, and as I reflected at home how it was the last time for cupcakes at school from me....instead of being sentimental......I was SO ok with that.


It's funny because on that day that I decided I was perfectly happy moving along and saying good-bye to this ritual, there was a little incident that perhaps was "the icing on the cake".

I brought the cupcakes in a box and waited for my son's class to enter the lunchroom and begin to assemble at their long, rectangular lunch table.  When all the students sat down, I started on the row opposite my son and began placing a cupcake in front of each child.  I happened to be across from my son and was about to take out a cupcake for one child and he says, "I don't like chocolate."  I said "OK, they are chocolate" and gave the child next to him a cupcake, and continued down the side of the table placing cupcakes in front of about 8 kids, then started working my way up the other side of the table.  That is when a cafeteria worker stopped me.

She said to me gesturing at the the boy who didn't want a cupcake, "He says you did not give him a cupcake."  I tell her, "He told me he does not like chocolate and I have chocolate cupcakes."  She then tells the child, "Well, she only had chocolate cupcakes."  I asked the boy, "Did you tell me that you do not eat chocolate?"  and he replied yes.  I then moved along to finish passing them out.

So that was a first--while I was passing out cupcakes this child actually drew enough attention about his lack of a cupcake to the supervisor for her to come over.  I am not taking this personally--actually it gave me a glimpse of what many parents may not be aware of--the constant need for manners and discipline in the classroom.  Last year the teachers were asked to give up their 25 minutes of lunch time to eat lunch with their students to mind them.  This year I am happy that the teachers have their bathroom and lunch break (a couple of personnel were hired to monitor the lunch room and parents have been asked to volunteer--it is a great way to see the constant disciplining that has to take place and I am not even talking about cupcake manners).  Many students said "thank you".  Later I reiterated to my son that he must always say thank you when someone gives him something--a team snack, etc.


But here is what else I have to say about it.  If teachers are to be graded  based on their students' test scores for merit pay, the teachers need to grade the parents on certain parenting criteria.

I'm So Glad I Did Not Eat a Bagel Loaded With Poppy Seeds

I had to go to a lab the other day to take a drug test which means I had to provide a urine sample in a cup.

Why did I have to do this?

Well, check out this poster I made and put on the door for the boys to see when they got home from school the other day:

WOO-HOO!!

You guys were so right in your comments in the beginning of June that I would find something better.

I am So Excited.

Thanks SO MUCH  for your support and encouragement this summer!

P.S.  The last item listed in green on the poster I made states we will get a new TV--we can already cross that item off the list and now we have a loud living room again.

Harvest Moon Tonight and Tomorrow

The 2011 Harvest Moon is technically in the five o'clock a.m. hour of September 12 but it can be see as full both tonight and tomorrow night.  The autumnal equinox is on September 23rd and the Harvest Moon is the moon that is full closest to this date, which means that some years it occurs in October.

The moon rises earlier during the Harvest full moon and it appears to be brighter and bigger as a result of it shining lower in the sky.

The sky is bright and blue right now just as it was ten years ago and I will be taking a walk later this afternoon.  I didn't think I wanted to read or watch coverage on the 9/11 ten year date.  But as I sat at the computer and clicked on a Yahoo story, which led to another story, I couldn't stop reading about an incredible story of Rick Rescorla whose job was VP of Security at Morgan Stanley/Dean Witter in the South Tower that day for a reason: to help save the lives of thousands of employees working on 20 floors.  He was supposed to have the day off but filled in for someone else.  Only a few in his firm perished.

I will be reading several books soon about this incredible man, a colonel and a hero defined by how he lived his life before and after he became an American citizen.  And who on 9/11/01 performed his last, but not his first, act of heroism.  (it's easy to find many articles googling his name).

Mr. Rick Rescorla (and his best friend) told the Port Authority of NY and NJ (owner of the WTC)  in 1990 that an attack on the WTC from the garage was likely and they told him to just focus on his floors of Morgan Stanley/Dean Witter and so he did.  It was his job to think like a terrorist.  During the terrorist attack in 1993 he evacuated all employees and was the last to remain.  He knew that the terrorists would try again in the future but this time from the air.  He asked his firm about moving the whole office to a different location but the lease wasn't up until 2006 and so he initiated practice evacuation drills several times a year.  He always told the employees that if there is fire in a building you go down and not up.  On 9/11/01 in the South Tower he ignored the Port Authority's advice to stay put after the North Tower was hit, and evacuated the 2,700 on 20 floors (including 250 visitors that day there for training).  He also instructed for 1,000 employees in another nearby building to evacuate.

It wasn't easy to take investment bankers away from their computers but he did this drill for years and on 9/11/01 they were prepared.  As they systematically went down the stairs in pairs he reminded the employees to "be proud to be an American," and sang "God Bless America" and other songs over his bullhorn to help evacuees stay calm as they left the building such as these words from a Celtic military song:

Men of Cornwall stand ye steady;
It cannot be ever said ye
for the battle were not ready;
Stand and never yield!  

By the time the second plane hit the South Tower just 17 minutes after the first tower was attacked, most of the employees were already out of the building except for three.  He and two other security men headed back up.  Out of a total of 3,700 employees, six perished including Rick Rescorla.  He spoke to his wife when the evacuation began and told her he was a happy man and that she had made his life.

Peeved at Teacher

I'm thinking about starting a series of blog posts on my experiences with my sons' teachers and school experiences.  At first I thught I'd call it "Middle School Mondays" because I have almost six years' experience and many stories, positive and negative, but a high school teacher has been on my mind.

The good thing about having a huge blow-up with high school son on a late Saturday night when Hubs is in Florida surfing post-Hurricane Irene waves and I'm left battling with the son who likes to socialize all weekend long rather than catching up on any schoolwork--the good thing is that we ended up really, really talking about what's on his mind and since then he has been sharing some (note I say some) info with me.

With our urging--and I regret the urging at this point in time--he is taking an Advanced Placement course and it involves Lots of reading and weekly quizzes and projects.  As it states in his class syllabus, this is supposed to be a college level course. 

The other day I went through my son's backpack after he got home from school and looked through every paper he had in every three-ring binder, particularly for this AP class (not a normal activity for me).  There are several things that bother me about the lack of respect this teacher has for his students in this "college level course" so I am going to number them in no particular order.

1).  A group research project is taking place and there's a hand-out with the directions.  The teacher wants the students to obtain their info from the textbook and any other research online is fine, but just icing on the cake (my words).  What he wrote: "Use the information from your textbook.  Once you have completed that you can go online and research your little pubescent hearts out."  Condescending? I may have not noticed this one sentence in and of itself, but it is the other things my son has told me adds up to my seeing a lack of respect for these 15 and 16 year olds.

2).  My son thought this was a serious class.  It is tough for him.  Distractions are what he struggles with at home when trying to get any schoolwork done.  During multiple quizzes the teacher is in the back of the class kicking a soccer ball against the wall over and over.

3).  During quizzes the the teacher is in the back of the room looking at his I-phone playing an app that involves animal noises.  Kids giggle and laugh.

4).  Recently my son and his group of three other students had to present a project in front of the class.  One of them got up with his backpack still on his back.  The teacher asked if he was going to present with the backpack on and the student took it off and the teacher stated it didn't matter to him if he wore it or not.  As the students orally presented, the teacher was standing near his desk to the side of the room and he mocked the student by reaching down to the teacher's own backpack and put it on and took it off--put it on and took it off.  So during their presentation, the teacher had the class giggling as a result.  My son said it was extremely distracting for all four of them to keep on task presenting their project.

Can you say Immature as well as Disrespectful?

I'd like your opinions.  I'd like to email the teacher and ask for a phone call, but in my lifetime of having a child in high school for 1+ years, the two times I emailed a teacher asking a question I was never answered.  So I'm thinking of calling the 10th grade assistant principal.  I do not want this immature teacher to single out my son in any way.

I treat teachers as professionals, giving respect to their education and experience as much as I would to any other professional specialist and I can't stand it when I hear of unprofessional behavior.  He is also a coach.  I bet he thinks he is a "fun" teacher but my son does not feel this way.

Am I embarrassed to be involved this way with a 15 year old's school classes?  Not at all.  Hubs and I are all over our kids on a daily basis on our expectations for their behavior to us, to the household, to others and to their schoolwork and...... they know that occasionally we will have their back when we see less than appropriate behavior from adults.  I have stories, people.

So please let me know your advice for how to phrase this to the 10th grade principal.

On the Eve of a Three-Day Weekend I'm Feeling Grumpy

Today I've had a case of the downers.

To get caught up, I have not yet been told yes or no about my status as a candidate for two jobs.  Since I last mentioned some interviews on August 2nd, Job #1 is still a potential option....but the length of time it's taken to have three phone interviews is insane.  I did get moved along to have a phone call with the big boss, which made a total of 3 phone interviews, which is the last of the process.  That went well as far as I could tell and he said he'd give his feedback to mgr #1 I spoke to.......about 5 weeks ago!  I follow up weekly with the recruiter, as is the protocol, and she informed me that she would be talking to the mgr #1 (that is the actual hiring mgr) this week as she was on vacation last week.  Well, this week is over and no update. I'll be following up again on Tuesday.

A few weeks ago a new job presented itself to me by a recruiter who called me and it is a good company, nearby.  I first had to meet with the recruiter and she was all thrilled over me.  Seriously--maybe I should see her again to get all perky.  So I met the hiring mgr at this job and all went well.  Then I got invited back in for meeting #2 to meet the big boss and then "the group" a week ago today.  It was 4 people across the table from me and the manager whom I'd met the last time I was there.  They didn't ask me anything I couldn't handle.  I'm actually overqualified I believe.  Read: salary issue.  But it went well, and of course I sent fabulously well-written thank you notes.  The independent recruiter who found me for this job did have the decency to give me an update this week.....that they haven't decided yet.  And I'm one of three people who could do the job but not sure if he wants an experienced person (me) or not very experienced (funny, that is not how he presented his job needs to me).

So both of these could end up being no jobs...and there is not a whole lot else out there.  Or if there is, I know that employers are taking their SWEET ASS TIME with candidates.

BTW, Hubs has made a list of all the projects we need done around this old house....once I get a salary again.

The other reason I'm grumpy is that I am so HOT!!!!  As in sweaty, all-encompassing HOT Flash city over here!  I am now waking up several times a night--a problem I never had before.  I'm looking like a hot mess with horrible circles under my eyes.  Driving around doing errands is good because the AC blasts on me.  I have discovered that small electric fans are my best friend at home.  I practically have one attached to me at all times and it goes where I go like a walking epidural.  At bedtime I have to have a fan blasting about 12 inches from my body.  At the computer it is on the floor behind me.  I keep a second one in the kitchen--it is a godsend on the kitchen counter.

I'm about to unplug the fan next to me and carry it downstairs and watch a Netflix dvd on our One and Only TV that's located in the basement-- after I throw a son off the PS3.  The TV in our main family room died last month because TVs hardly last 5 years anymore and these words have been spoken: we get a new TV when Mom gets a job.

Something has to happen this month.

My Thirteen and His Age Thirteen

During the first week of school last week my middle son's eighth grade Language Arts teacher asked her students to interview a parent about his or her own memories from age 13.  He had some specific questions such as --

·         What was your favorite TV show?

·         What musical artists did you like?

·         What TV or movie star did you have a crush on?

·         What was your favorite candy bar?

·         What did you want to do as an adult?

·         What do you remember about your childhood home?

On that last question before waiting for an answer he interjected that he knew that one would be  hard to answer because he “ knew I moved frequently and had many different homes”.  For example, I’ve told the boys how I went into 7^th grade it was my seventh school.

When he asked me these questions, right away my answers were short, and with a frustrated tone such as “How should I remember that?”  or “I have no memory of that” and with the easy going good humor that he has, he’d answer, “I know, what does she expect these parents to be as young as just 25 years old or something”.  (Hmmm, anyway).  So I lightened up and told him what I remembered

Picturing where we lived that year I remembered Happy Days on TV, my first album that age was Elton John, I thought Leif Garrett was cute, I bought that square candy bar called Chunky, I wanted to be a writer, and I had my own room when I was little with a pretty red and pink floral bedspread.

Later that night the memories became more fluid and what I didn’t tell him is that when I was 13 I once saw my stepfather have a slugfest fight with my 15 year old brother while my mother stood there and watched and didn’t do anything and I heard screams and realized they were mine.

When I was 13 I started my period and apparently one day unbeknownst to me a tiny smear got on an armchair and my stepfather went into a rage with the seat cushion two inches from my face.  He had issues.

In my 8th grade year we lived in a tiny apartment yet I went to a private school with kids who lived in mansions (not all but those in my carpool certainly did) and a girl in our carpool actually had a butler drive us to school in a limo.  And made fun of my family. (fortunately I found great friends and we're friends today since age 13, especially one).

I was caught in two worlds between that world and the kids on my block.  Not knowing who to be I pretended I was newly arrived from France and spoke with an accent and tried to search for the correct English word when we spoke (I kept this up for a couple months then came clean and they still liked me—it was boys—obviously I was desperate for attention).  But I was me at school.

    *     *         *         *      *       *      *     *     *

The other night Hubs and I sat in our son’s language arts class as part of curriculum night and on the walls were poems the students wrote after interviewing a parent.  My middle son had put together the memories I shared into a poem called “Where I’m From”.

It was so hard not to cry while reading it.

Back at home I told him I loved his poem and that he did a great job.  I asked if he had a copy but he didn’t as the teacher likes them to write in class only.  I asked if he would eventually bring the printed poem home.  He said, “Are you going to blog about it?”

My kids don’t know exactly where I’m from but, but I think they get me.  Even though some of the memories aren’t the best, where I’m from makes me who I am and I'm proud of who my kids are.  And so glad not to be thirteen!

Baseball Season -- the Fifteen Year Old Son Edition

Our oldest son who's 15 is playing baseball on a recreation league for 15, 16 and 17 year olds (you know things are different when the boys you've seen for years are driving their families' vehicles to the park).

There are so many positives of children getting older (I need to remind myself of these things!) and one of them is sports.

It has been a while since we have arrived at the ball field and find out a piece of equipment has been forgotten at home.

The baseball games go by fast when boys can throw, hit, catch and make lots of double plays.

There is no assigned day for me to bring a drink and snacks for everyone.  Our son fills up his own water bottle at home and he knows to eat breakfast before we leave and knows we eat lunch later--end of story!  And I saw he brought his own bag of sunflower seeds for a snack.

The coach has older sons--in fact the coach has his college aged sons do the coaching most of the time--and there is no game ball that is given to a "star" player after the game.  They play as a team, right?

The parents are awesome--they introduce themselves, are friendly, and they watch the game!

The parents of this new team are smart.   We arrived for the first game this past Saturday at 10:30 a.m. it was already a scorcher.  And look what two families had already set up at our bleachers:



They brought canopies they popped open and set up over the bleachers and all of us parents of 13 boys had shade.  It was genius.

After I Got Tired of Job Hunting, I Tie Dyed

The kids are back in school, the Hubs is back in his classroom, and I have the house to myself.

Sometimes you read about bloggers who get envious of other women's blogs, reading about their lives and seeing their wonderful pictures.  I don't feel that way very often, but I did get that feeling the other day while surfing around LinkedIn.  That is the site where workers post info about themselves professionally, and usually in a resume format.  So I have spent many hours the past two weeks looking up people with whom I've formerly worked, people who've interviewed me this summer, people with whom I will speak with soon, and people who know people of all these types listed.  And everyone has a great existing job and better career path than me it seems.

So one day I got sick of it, backed away from the computer, and tackled a tie dye project.  I went from no tie dye experience to owner of a tie dyed shirt in a matter of minutes.  I'm all spontaneous.

Actually I have had tie dye on the brain as something to do this summer along with the previously posted slip n' slide project.  I found some sites while Googling tie dye and I liked the idea of not having to buy anything to tie dye a shirt.  Of course I thought I'd do this project with at least one of my offspring but I ended up getting crafty alone.

Here's what I created alone in a matter of minutes:

First you go through your closet and drawers to find a black item of clothing.  I found this black t-shirt from Target.  You could use a different dark color if you wanted.

Then, to get this swirl pattern you put the shirt on the floor and use something like the handle of a butter knife or a dowel and place it in the middle of the shirt and slowly twirl it:

You then have all sorts of rubberbands ready.  When you take out your twirling instrument, you have to manually tuck around the sleeves.  Then you keep your shirt in the resulting pie shape and start wrapping rubberbands all around it like this:

Looks crazy, right?  I used maybe around twelve various-sized rubberbands.

Then I put a bucket into the sink and added bleach and warm water to it.  You want one part of bleach to 2 parts water.  So I just poured in the bleach to about an inch and eye-balled how much more water to add.  This is when I should have actually taken the show outside because the whole house smelled like bleach and the poor hamster may have gotten high from the fumes.  Learn from my impulsiveness.

Then you place your weird pie shaped, scrunched-up shirt into the bucket and jab it around with a utensil and flip it over.  Next thing I knew my shirt now looked brick-red and so was the water.  The shirt was submerged for about 7 minutes.  you wouldn't want it in any longer than that.  Five minutes may be best.

Take it out and rinse it off, removing the rubberbands in the sink.  I held it up and was most impressed with myself, and hung it outside to dry.

When the boys came home from school they were impressed too and the 13 year old and 10 year old want to try it.  Now I have a whole new plan of attack next time I visit the Goodwill.  Scarves!  Long sleeved shirts!  And there are other designs I'd like to try besides the swirl.

Here is where I got the idea and it has great photos--you just scroll halfway down page to click to each page.


And here is a site I just saw that shows how to fold the shirt like an accordian and then rubberband it bewteen two pieces of wood.

So, take that all you professionals on LinkedIn who are working at your great jobs right now as I sit here in my gym shorts, bra-less, eating a homemade, lemon-poppyseed muffin and getting ready to shower at noon.

P.S. I have moved up the rungs in my candidate-process for the good opportunity at the work from home job, after two-plus weeks of the recruiter getting back to me after my first two phone interviews with managers.  I have phone interview with head honcho in a couple days. Met with another good company this week and that went well too and am supposed to get called back in to meet the rest of the group.