Ten Minutes In and We Walked Out Of The Movie Theater Tonight

Well, I'm sure that Hubs and I will be speaking of tonight for many years to come.  We made plans to go out tonight to see A King's Speech.  So we left the two teens at home (the youngest was sleeping at a friends house) and we headed out early to shop at a few stores first--the movie theater was attached to a mall.  There there was a Chili's at this mall and we had some dinner and had a super nice waitress and everything was peachy.


We arrived early for our 7:30 movie and it was at the very end of the hallway.  It was such a small theater, but we had our pick of the rows and we sooted in the middle.  The seats were comfy and I was feeling fine (back at the restaurant I had ordered a "platinum" margarita and had no idea it was one of those in which the glass is the size of a soccer ball).


More and more people arrived and just before the movie started, our row was completely filled up except for the seat next to Hubs, who was on my right.  On my left was an older man who resembled Bad Santa with a very large belly....and he was snoring very loudly.  Hubs looked over at him to check out who was sleeping--only the man wasn't sleeping--this was his breathing style.  Inhale and exhale...inhale and exhale.  Loud and annoying.  Plus, he smelled like mothballs (Hubs agreed on this later).  Ugh.


Then a minute after the movie started another very large man takes the seat next to Hubs.  Another Loud Breather!!  But not as loud as Snore Man next to me.  As soon as this guy sat down he took out his IPhone and checked his mail.  Oh no.  This guy was going to hear it from Hubs.  We saw True Grit over Winter Break and a guy in front of us did this--right at the time the teenager Mattie was in the snake pit and Hubs yells out, "Put The Phone Away!"  It really was deserved.


Fortunately this guy did not check the phone again....at least not while we were still there....  The movie began and we started to hear really loud noises like babies crying, shrieks here and there, lots of talking, white noise, etc. coming from next door.  I wondered what movie was playing so loud that we had to hear it.  We tried to ignore it and concentrate on the movie, which is after all about a man's speech and so one is fixed on the words.  It's not like our movie had any music or a loud soundtrack to drown out these distracting noises from next door.  I whispered to Hubs, "What on earth is playing next door?" and he tells me that it is the entrance/foyer area of the mall and the noise is the population out there.  WTH?


Meanwhile, Snore Moth Ball Man next to me is relentless.  Hubs and I agree we can't take it any longer.  I suggested to Hubs that he walk out and tell management about the mall noise and I'd wait.  A few minutes later he appeared back at the doorway with a gesture that mission was accomplished and I left as well and we got our money back (manager was very nice, offered another movie, or our money back).


On the way home we fantasized about winning the lottery and then creating our own movie theater room or at least renting out a theater.  I don't mean to sound all crabby but I am sort of glad that the noise from outside the theater was so loud and gave us a final reason to leave because Snore Man #1 and #2 would have ruined the movie for us without a doubt (and with the theater so small there weren't any seats left).  Shucks, I know it is a good movie, but looks like we won't be going to any movie theaters together for a while.

Engaged Parenting

It’s been a weary parenting week—seems there is always something to address every night, or a sports practice.  In a couple of weeks I will be going to a pretty cool part of the USA for a business trip on a Friday and I asked Hubs if he wanted to go too and we’d farm out the kids and make a weekend out of it—not something previously done.  I was all caught up in the idea but after talking about it we realized that it was far to go for just 2.5 days, flying is a huge hassle, the three boys in three different schools and two in sports…..is a lot going on.  Hubs does have summers off and loves road trips.  And right now it is best for one parent to be here and hold down the fort—I swear these teens keep you on your toes if you are engaged and know what’s going on.

Now that they are 14 and 13 I think a lot about when I was their age and I thought of something I hadn’t thought of in 25 years or so.  Picture high school with all of its activities—sports, clubs, lots of homework, wanting to be with friends.

When I was 15 and my brother was 17, my mother and ex-step-father left us alone at home while they went on a vacation.  I’m not talking about a weekend alone as portrayed in movies, or like my Hubs’ stories of parents leaving for the weekend and the kids had a party.

My folks went to Europe for 4 weeks and left us alone.  This was in the time before cell phones.  My mother had decided that November was a good time to go to Europe (less crowded).  So they went to all the typical countries for a pleasure trip (the two of them during our school year).  

 Making a phone call from Europe was a big deal back then.  There were no neighbors, friends or family  taking care of us (we’d moved to this new part of town 4 months prior).  I have no idea how they could have been reached if something had happened.  My mom called us a couple of times.

I remember she left a well-stocked refrigerator and $200 for groceries and gasoline.  My brother didn’t have his own car so he used hers for getting to school.  He went to a public school located in our old neighborhood about 25 miles away.  I do recall a big lecture later on how much mileage he put on the car—I remember that he took off to see friends on the weekends.

I was 15 and had been going to the same private school for years—my folks moved a lot around a large, metro area, buying, renovating and reselling our homes.  Luckily for me, after 7^th grade,  changing zip codes did not mean I had to change schools every couple years.  There were no buses so it was customary for parents to arrange a carpool, or to pay a senior who had her own car to have riders the whole year.  We lived pretty far from my school but there was a senior in my area who picked me up and brought me home every day for the 45 min ride. 

Amazingly  I got dressed in my uniform each morning and made my lunch every day.  I did my homework each day and studied for tests/did projects.  Who knows what we did for dinner – frozen food I guess (my mom laughed afterward for years at how the salad stuff she left in the fridge had turned to “green soup” while she was gone).  All of my friends from school lived spread-out over miles of this metro area so no friends nearby.  And we had no outside activities such as sports or clubs.  We are lucky that my brother and I were pretty good kids and nothing bad happened.  

Back to the present, the important thing for us is that Hubs and I do want alone time together and we will try again this weekend to see a movie and maybe have a bite to eat together.  That kind of getaway we can do right now.

Yes! I Still Have One Who Loses Teeth!

Yesterday when I got home from work all three boys were playing basketball in the driveway.  It made my heart full of joy because they were playing together and seemed to be having fun (lately Eldest tends to pick on Middle and Middle tends to pick on Youngest).

Youngest son runs over to my window and opens his mouth to show me that a lower, front molar has fallen out and in its place I see the top of a new molar coming in.  It seems it has been a while since anyone in our house lost a tooth.  I remember one week four years ago when all three were losing teeth and the Tooth Fairy was scrounging around for dollar bills.

I got a kick out of Youngest telling me yesterday that he may have to leave a note for the Tooth Fairy because he left his tooth at school.  He was with another teacher’s kid in a different classroom after school, chewing a Starburst candy when it happened—he felt a gap in his mouth and took out the somewhat chewed Starburst and his tooth was stuck in it.  I told him it would have been pretty cool to put the tooth along with the Starburst in a baggie.

I forgot to remind him last night to leave a note….and I got another kick out of parenthood when this morning when I woke him up he reached under his pillow (nothing under it) and said, “Oh yeah, I need to find my tooth at school this morning and then bring it home.”  Well, he knows what is up with parents and the Tooth Fairy (he’s age 10), but what kid doesn’t love money and this kid is sweet to indulge his mom in the tooth-losing-parent-ritual-process. We have found middle son in the closet on the phone near midnight a few times recently talking to a girl, and Oldest doing other teenage things recently so I was quite ecstatic to ooh and ahh over Youngest’s missing tooth and Tooth Fairy ceremonial.

However, this afternoon I will be getting on a plane and will spend the night somewhere else tonight so Hubs needs to wear the male-version of the Tooth Fairy role tonight.  I left two dollar bills on his side of the bed and will remind him on the phone about three times tonight (regular teeth always earn $1 in our house but molars fetch $2).  Off topic—why is it that when I go out of town and want to vegetate in a hotel bed and watch TV with my very own remote control that he suddenly has to talk on the phone with me for an hour (I am prepared with my phone charger today).

Before I leave to head to the airport in search of a security line that does not have a body scanner (easy to do in Atlanta; other states not so much) I’d like to mention a PSA on multiple offspring and losing teeth.  If you are saving teeth, label envelopes or put post-it notes in baggies with ages and whose tooth it is.  Or maybe I am the only one who didn’t think about setting up a filing system for teeth??  On my cupboard-cleaning kick last month I opened a bathroom drawer and found about 20 zip lock baggies with one tooth in each baggie and only a few notes as to the date and whose tooth it was!  I moaned and groaned over this but then realized that the boys won’t care.  Youngest has his “eyeteeth” and a few more molars left to lose so maybe I’ll start a more organized method of tooth identification.  And to be honest I threw a few out since they had some blood and looked gross.  One can’t be sentimental over everything….. did I mention that one of the boys has now reached my height.....

February's Full Moon -- the Snow Moon Almost Slipped By

Your comments on my last post were so sweet.  The week went by so fast that I forgot to plan a post about the full moon.  Last night I stopped by the grocery store on the way home and when I left the store it was dark out and the moon! was full.  So technically the full moon is Friday but it looked full on Thursday night.

February’s full moon is called the Snow Moon because Feb is when most snowfall occurs.  There is no more snow around here—in fact I had to put the AC on in the car the other day (73 degrees and my high body temp).

Luckily the weather was great for the February wedding we went to—it was lovely and very sentimental, as the couple (same exact ages as we were then) held their wedding just down the road from where Hubs and I said our vows…23 years ago.  This wedding was the first one in which we were invited as friends of the groom’s parents—they are a tad bit older than we are plus they didn’t wait years to have kids like we did.  So I knew we’d have a different perspective as guests at this wedding but I didn’t realize how nice it would feel.

So there was the groom who we hadn’t seen in years—since he and his college friend helped us move our furniture into our house for some cash.  And there was his brother, hardly recognizable at age 21, toasting him at the reception with beautiful words.  Sigh.  What a feeling—I can only hope that my sons experience that.  And when the groom danced with his mom I was not the only one with tears on my cheeks.

It truly felt great being able to just sit back (and not be part of any family drama) and watch the young people and then leave without eating any cake, and get home at 9:25 (our boys were really shocked we were home so early) and get out of that Spanx-y cami that really didn’t help, and into my comfy clothes.  I’m getting old.  But the important thing is that Hubs felt the same way about everything I’ve said here.

Valentines Day is not too big for us, mainly because we are so swamped with the boys but also because Hubs’ birthday is a few days later so plans for that are always more prominent.  But now I am having to assist the two teens in our house with their Valentines plans!!

Our 7^th grader surprised me on Saturday by saying to me, “I’d like to get a rose for a girl for Monday so can you take me to a florist this weekend?”  So I casually said sure, that they’d sell them at a grocery store.  Then I drove to 5 stores on Sunday with him trying to find just one or two or three and not in a vase.  Mission was accomplished and he carried a rose in cellophane on the bus on Monday.  Dang!  Last time he liked a girl was 3rd grade so now not only his voice is something changing around here.

Then, the 9^th grader, who does have a girlfriend who lives 30 mins away so not at same school, knew he would not see her pre-Valentine’s weekend, (grounded) so, being the good mom that I am, I told him a week in advance that he could send her a card via snail mail.  You know, it didn’t even occur to me for him to send her an online card.  Well, he was banished from his IPod, maybe that is why I thought of “old school” Valentine tactics.  On Saturday I took him to the drugstore to pick out a card and then at home he wrote something and then—I drove like a maniac to the post office to mail this one thing!  Fortunately the post office delivered as I heard she got the card on V-Day.

As for my V-Day, Hubs and I exchange cards with lots of words written in them.  I do have to remind him about 10 times how Valentine’s day is coming up.  I am a word person because reading and saving his cards feeds me.

If you missed it last night, be sure to gaze at the Full Snow Moon tonight!

February Breakthrough

So far February has been a huge dose of the usual days and nights of my life as a wife, mother of three, (more specifically an older mother of three with increasingly annoying hot flashes), and a paycheck-earner.

Sometimes when Monday morning arrives I think about how I did nothing for myself on the weekend, (other than go to the library and get books and magazines that sometimes don’t get read), or did nothing as a couple alone.  This usually happens after a jam-packed weekend of the usual: errands, cleaning, cooking, transporting kids and lots of food shopping.  This typically follows a work-week of working, errands, cleaning, cooking, food shopping, transporting kids, and six-hour sleeps.

It is noted that Hubs has similar work weeks and weekends, minus the food shopping and cooking, tasks replaced by some weekends tutoring his students, and working in his classroom, and other chores.

But back to me.  The lack of time for me, my dreams, my leisure, my closet, my grooming…..can really lead to a frustrated state of mind.

But the frustration doesn’t stay long, and for that I am grateful.

Hubs and I are going to a wedding Saturday night which works for us as a date.  There will be me-time with make-up, perfume, new shoes (hence a lunchtime errand), a hair appointment, (and putting on Spanx in private) and in the evening there will be witnessing of vows, dinner, dancing, and reminiscing.  And no sitter back at home to coordinate or pay.

I have told the boys the following so many times this week they probably think I am losing my short-term memory:  “Dad and I are going out Saturday night from 5:00 to almost midnight.  You will be home.  You will be good to each other.  You will not be driven anywhere after Saturday afternoon.”

So that has me perked up about the weekend.  And then yesterday I saw something so beautiful while driving to work that I was uplifted about the work week.  It had snowed about an inch overnight and the lawns, houses and foliage were covered in white.  Since the snow was so lightweight, there was a lot of it cradled in all of the trees.  The sky was blue, which hasn’t been seen in days, and the morning sun was shining on the snow-covered trees near and far.  It was breathtaking.  The same street scenes seen every day were glowing.  I usually don’t talk out loud when I am alone but I said, “So….Incredibly….. Beautiful”.  And I just soaked it in during my 20 minute drive.  I even waited till I was parked at work to put on my mascara.

The morning beauty had me spinning my thoughts around.  At first I was negative and hard on myself with:  “Oh, why don’t I have my camera.  Well, no matter ‘cause it’s not like I can pull over and take photos, running late and all."  But then I told myself that it was OK that I didn’t have my camera with me, just like it is OK to be me and just make banana or pumpkin bread without stopping to place a little pumpkin next to the bowl and photo it. 

It’s OK to be me and work even when I don’t want to and instead felt grateful that we have jobs and can pay most of the bills.  It is OK that I didn’t get to have much time to myself last weekend because I will make time this weekend.  Instead of thinking of how worn out we are with giving the boys lectures on something that invariably comes up every day, I thought of a good time or a good laugh I had with each of the boys in the last week in between all that parenting.

When I left work and drove home, all traces of the snow in the trees or on the ground were gone.  But my feelings of well-being remained this morning.  Even after a new week night event that involved parental lecturing and training.