So yesterday I asked one of the boys to go out and check the mail and then he brought her into the kitchen with us:
Oh yeah. The hot SI swimsuit issue that is supposed to melt the icicles off of everyone’s roof shingles in February. I completely forgot that this is an annual appearance. It’s been a long time since I have seen this issue. The pose on the cover with bikini bottoms pulled halfway off must be very popular these days because it is repeated on the inside on various models about six times. From the bios provided the models are all age 19 to 24. Twenty years ago we girls in bikinis were a little more concerned with keeping our -- um -- strays under control (back when a Brazilian just meant someone from Brazil).
Additionally featured are models nude with their swim suits PAINTED ON. And some models are holding their bikinis in their hands, rather than wearing them (with arms strategically posed).
My husband walked in the door and I told him the Swimsuit issue had arrived and he ran to go get it. Now I know from whom I should have hidden it. Just kidding. He behaved—he flipped through it quickly and said, "OK so it's a bunch of bathing suits." And I was proud when he commented on how race car driver, Danica Patrick, really took the focus away from being an actual race car driver by laying on her back on a race car wearing a bikini and high heels.
It turns out Oldest Son seems to not have even looked through the issue much. Each morning this week before school he locates the magazine and rubs the sample strip of men's cologne on his clothes. In the mornings we have time together alone before he goes off to 7th grade and I go off to work. I said to him, “I can’t believe this is a swimsuit issue and many girls aren’t even wearing their suits.” He says, “Mom--it seems like you have looked through the magazine more than anyone.” I laugh my head off at that one. He has a knack for calling it like it is.
8 comments:
Ha! He did call it, didn't he? I would be the same as you, poring over it so I could offer a feminist critique. LOL.
That's me on the cover.
I actually hid that from my middle school son one year. I don't know if that was right or not, but that's what I did. There's no parent manual for this kind of stuff. You can't keep your kids in a bubble, and yet you don't want to condone junk, either.
Ah, yes the hairless women. Do you ever wonder what these girls do in between waxes, or is there a brazilian laser treatment? Really though, I think this cover shows a lot of talent, to be able to have your swimsuit that low without your coochie showing is an art form.
Thanks for posting this so that I can rant.
Also, thanks for commenting on my blog. I consider myself a newbie blogger too even though it's been 7 months now. I used to live in Roswell GA and yes you are right about Texas being midwife friendly. I have a couple friends in Atlanta that have gone the midwife route as well and it was an uphill battle for them.
That is so funny! Sometimes we do tend to focus on those types of things more than they do:)
Thanks for your comments! You all really got what I was aiming for. I tried so hard and they weren't into it....
Laura--I've been on the cover too...but it was 1984 for me!
This is hilarious! I even made Stevie read it! I love how you quote Keegan, it always makes him sound so funny! Let me just ask, where do you go after painted on bikinis? I mean, where is there left to go? 20 years ago you were talking airbrush, and there you go. Let's make sure our young men grow up to be polite and kind-hearted, and understand that these girls are so undernourished their own mom could take 'em out with one punch!
"Back when a Brazilian meant someone from Brazil" made me laugh out loud. And for the record, I agree with your husband about Danica. Not that she can't be sexy AND drive a race car, but it seems like it hurts her credibility just a little bit.
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